Happy Father’s Day
When I was 16 my father kicked me out and again when I was 18. This affected me emotionally, physically, psychologically, socially, academically, drastically….ally (ad infinitum). I felt like I was robbed of my self confidence, self-esteem, self-worth…everything. I was so ashamed, I didn’t want any of my friends to know what happened , but my close friends and my neighbours knew. But I was fortunate that there were caring people in my life who took me into their home and welcomed me into their family. For many years, I was very angry with my Father. But I am not angry anymore. What I feel now for him is pity. I feel sorry for him because he never had a Father so he grew up without the love, care and guidance that only a Father can give to his child.
My Father was also an alcoholic. Now that I am much older and mature, and after studying the effects of alcohol on the brain, I am beginning to understand why he behaved the way he did. Alcohol alters the functions of the mind, causing one to behave aggressive, irrational and irresponsible. After the effects of alcohol have worn off, many people regret their actions.
Living with my father was a period of turmoil. He was very volatile. One minute he was calm and giving jokes and happy. The next minute he was angry and violent, using expletives and his whole demeanour changed. Of course I was scared of him. As soon as I could, I was on the first bus out of Montego bay to Kingston. College was my freedom. It was only after many years that I learnt to forgive my father. When he needs my help, I will help him, because Christianity teaches forgiveness and I am a Christian.
Anyway the moral of this story is , father’s, please realize that your actions may impact your children for the rest of their lives. Once you have a child, you are no longer thinking about you, you are now responsible for a life for the next 18 years. Indulging in habits like drinking may have a long term negative effect on not only your life, but the life of your children. Being a father is a privilege and a highly important duty, and this responsibility should not be taken lightly.
Happy Father’s Day to all the fathers who have embraced fatherhood and are living their lives in a manner that will show love, and that will be a positive example to their children.
